The zulusquad wageslave topic


#121

love to spend my afternoon in a user story time estimation meeting conference call

at least i can do it from my pajamas


#122

I got to skip my estimation meeting today because I broke prod.

In 2 weeks we are getting shuffled into new teams and practicing something called “Safe” agile


#123

remember to always put on a condom before you touch prod


#124

Is safe agile that thing where it’s “just the tip” except you’re still wearing your boxers


#125

3.5 hours of estimation didn’t finish im fuckin done today


#126

Scaled agile framework. I had to look it up


#127

Luckily my team refuses to do task estimation. It really pisses off our TPM, but thankgod we don’t have those meetings

We keep track of our work on a shared spreadsheet and boy is it confusing. I think next week we’re gonna sit down and have an all-day come-to-JIRA moment where we convert all of our current and future work items into tasks and start tracking there


#128

Who the hell estimates more than the next week or two of shit?!?

If you are estimating tasks for 3.5 hours, your scrum guy needs to come and probably kill someone.


#129

Unless your “agile” but suspiciously waterfall.

but then just lol


#130

DING DING DING


#131

also let me tell you that it doesn’t matter how much we scope because the date is pretty much already set


#132

We have a project list in place at work that has projects running months in advance, mostly its there to satisfy managers that don’t know what we do (I work in IT), but it can be nifty for reference.
Fuck predicting actual hours worked though, thats just retarded.


#133

Had a pretty good interview today, they said I’d know in 24 hours if I get a second interview. Just an hour ago they sent me background check and drug test paperwork so I guess that’s probably a good sign.


#134

Lmao they already sent me the drug test reservation email

I’ve never had to pee in a cup before a job offer

What do


#135
  1. Pee in the cup

  2. Don’t pee not in the cup.


#136

you gotta pee a few ml first out of the cup before you pee in the cup, thats how you purify the sample.
its like running your tap to make sure its clear first.


#137

What if I accidentally jizz in the cup


#138

#139

do it and say you were confused


#140

probably happens all the time